"Can do" and "Can't do"

Have you ever been in a house wherein you were overwhelmed by all that you could not do? You can't sit in this or that chair, you can't have shoes on the carpet, you can't take food or drinks into the living room, don't go in there or the cat will get out, etc. etc. Remember how uneasy that made you feel? Contrast that with homes that say, "Just come on it; sit anywhere. Make yourself at home. Can I bring you something to drink?" Recall how relaxed that atmosphere felt.

Here's a simple, no-brainer principle regarding people feeling welcome as newcomers to anything - homes, businesses, restaurants, theaters, or churches. If the "can't do's" are more clear and numerous than the "can do's," people will not feel welcome. I've seem dozens and dozens of churches of all sizes, settings, and brand names all through my adult lives. Way too many of them have more "can't do's" than "can do's." You can't come here unless you're dressed a certain way. You can't come here if you have trouble with steps. You can't come here and find the childcare room with ease. You can't come here unless you are literate. You can't come here and worship comfortably unless you know the Lord's Prayer by heart. You can't come here and join in any of the conversations that are already happening. Yet church people wonder, "Why won't new people come?" Sometimes we get so familiar with our own landscape that we don't even see the "can't do's" that are glaring and obvious to people who are new.

Just as when we're guests in a comfortable and welcoming home, people make note of places where the "can-do's" outweigh the "can't do's." Maybe that's why I like creeks and rivers so much. Water always moving, landscape changing all the time, multiple opportunities - lots of "can do" moments. I'll see you around the next bend in the river.